This feeling plagues gifted adults, and even gifted children, everywhere. It debilitates us, brings us huge heartache, and keeps us from becoming all that we were designed to be. But it doesn’t have to be that way…
“I’m not good enough” gets reinforced over and over in our lives when people don’t understand the way we think, when they tell us we could be so much more (implying that we aren’t), or when we see that we just don’t do things in the same way as so many others. We feel left out in so many ways, and conclude that we must not be good enough.
Then we build a wall – a wall that protects us from those negative, hurtful feelings. We hide the parts of ourselves that are different and force ourselves to fit in with the intention of connecting with people and becoming good enough, becoming worthy of their love.
But the thing that we so desperately try to gain is the same as what we ultimately lose in the end. By closing off our real selves we learn to turn off the true feelings that allow us to make the connections we search for. We stop, not only the painful feelings, but the loving ones, too. We stop being who we are, and in turn, by being who we’re not, become everything we were trying to avoid in the first place.
Brene Brown captures these ideas and so much more in her TED presentation in the video below. And she offers a perhaps unexpected solution.
It’s definitely worth the watch.